When we started this process...this journey through cancer hell, I told myself, and heard people tell me "Alex is such a strong boy, he'll make it through this!".
This cancer path we have traveled has been filled with children. Boys and girls, all fighting for their very lives. At times, the path is congested with those all racing towards their cure. Other times, the path is drenched with the tears of those whose children have lost their way, and will never return. And sometimes the road is silent. The shock of a new diagnosis or relapse is just too much to even utter a moan of sorrow.
I have learned that *all* of these children are strong. Strength is something every single child stricken with this vile disease has ten-fold. A strong child does not automatically mean they will beat this disease. A strong child does not automatically mean that they will not relapse. A strong child does not automatically mean that you won't have to say good-bye too soon.
My heart is aching for the parents who hear "Oh, your child is so strong, he will beat this!" echoing in the back of their minds, as they hold their son's hand in hospice, whispering to their boy's cancer-riddled body, that he is loved, and "good-bye". I follow the stories of many of the families that we have met through our battle with cancer. Many of these stories will not have happy endings.
Alex is just as strong as those children, and yet, they are dying. They won't get to see their next birthday, while Alex is celebrating his next week.
I don't take his birthday lightly. I am so grateful to the doctors who are helping my son be part of the survival statistics.
I know we are all looking to find hope, and words of encouragement to give each other in these times. Just remember the power of those words, and how they can turn to such great sorrow in a heartbeat.
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Sara & Eric : We all wished this monster called cancer would have passed by your doorstep and left you alone but when looking up the definition of strong you'l see ERIC & SARA so for me i want you to pick Alex up and hold him so close that you can feel your two hearts beating togheather and thats where you will find your Strength! GO TO HELL CANCER....patman
ReplyDeleteWe are so glad to celebrate Alex's birthday with you guys next week! We pray every night for you guys!
ReplyDeleteThank you for yet another look at Cancer, we love you!
ReplyDeleteSara, the manner of which you hold yourself during this difficult time is awe inspiring. You are always a model I think of when I am going through a rough patch. Your strength, your love, patience and your eloquence and grace is truly something to behold. May you find the peace you seek at the end of this journey. Love to you all, Sandi
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday (and many, many more). I am lucky to know you. What are the chances that Tessa would run a fever on a night I was working. I blessing, really.
ReplyDeleteSara...you and your family ARE strong. And you are an inspiration to your friends. One thing I have learned through all of this is not to ever EXPECT anything...good or bad. Sometimes I kick myself for that first night...I spent so much time talking you down and trying to convince both of us that he didn't have cancer, and that there was some simpler explanation for the symptoms. I hope that I have learned how to be a better friend since then, and just listen and be here for you.
ReplyDeleteLife has a lot of surprises to throw at us, and we just continue to move forward with the love of our families and friends. At the same time, I think we ALL expect the best possible outcome...and it's a healthy thing to do. It's like you told me one day...The Universe only says Yes. We are happy to be celebrating Alex's 5th birthday, and I look forward to celebrating his 6th, and 7th, ...and 17th!
xoxo Erin
My prayers are with your whole family - I think of you all so often - I. Smile though because love is never missing in your family & it spills over in abundance..... LOVE you guys.
ReplyDeleteEric and Sara,
ReplyDeleteI am Patman's sister, Heidi. We haven't met yet, and I'm regretful of that, but I do hope I have a chance to meet you and Alex. You sound like a remarkable family, and I feel lucky to have a chance to read and follow your posts. One never knows what to say when witnessing somebody else's sorrow and pain. It's obvious that you have the love that is the primary material for the building blocks of strength. I don't know how we ever know how strong we really are until we're tested, and, luckily, we don't get to know ahead of time just how strong we will need to be, but I do wish you all the love, strength and peace you need.